Whether you consider it fate, destiny, kismet or just plain luck, I venture to guess most of you recall where and when you first met your true love. Every day, as we drive down Broadway to work, my husband and I pass the place where we met—that derelict, graffiti-covered eyesore, once the home of Broadway Dodge. In this building, as employees of a bustling, successful dealership, Richard courted me and won my heart.
Several weeks ago, demolition began on the property. As the building was being dismantled, we noted its progress and reminisced. I was working in the parts department, surrounded by a motley crew of auto parts clerks and mechanics. I listened all day long to shop talk, drinking stories, and boasts of sexual prowess. Fresh from a painful divorce, I tuned them all out–including the quiet guy on the other side of the window in the warranty department.
An avid fisherman, Richard is an artist at tying fishing flies. In case you don’t know, fishing flies mimic bugs fish like to eat. Imagine my surprise as huge cockroaches and spiders began showing up on my computer keyboard. All the guys thought it was hilarious making the lone woman in the department squeal. Believe it or not, this sophomoric tactic worked and Richard and I began talking and taking refuge in each other.
So, almost 25 years later, the building is razed to the ground, but we are still standing together. Any married couple will tell you marriage is not a constant love-fest. With all the usual problems and trying to make that ‘blended family’ thing happen, it is often hard work.
So, what is the secret to a good marriage? You and your spouse may have your own, here are a few of mine: It is not necessary to share all the same interests. Appreciate and listen when your spouse goes on about their favorite hobby, even if you haven’t a clue–like fly-fishing. Try really hard not to criticize your spouse’s family. It OK for them, not OK for you. Be friends.
Next time you are together, take a few minutes with your spouse, significant other, partner… stoke that love flame and remember your first meeting.
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